Damn Distractions

It’s been 5 whole months since I last posted and my sincerest apologies to all those who have craved for the lengthy posts of debauchery, comedy, and craziness that is my life and your entertainment…I’ve missed sharing my stores and in this time I’ve amassed quite some good content for you all on an assorted arrangement of scraps of paper, post its, and phone notes to myself. Quite telling of the life I was living over the past few months.

I must say that I will blame at least 40% of my absence to those damn distractions. I’m about accountability so I can’t say it was all this stuff but it got crazy f’real. As a purveyor of productivity, efficiency, and hard work I fell into the abysmal rabbit hole of distractions that consumed me from almost every angle. The crazy thing was that while being distracted (but never fully detoured) I had to act like everything was alright. I mean the front will always be the cover of your life’s magazine but man when the pages are being worn the cover can start to fade fast. So in an attempt to justify my absence from the That Damn Anne! Blogosphere I’ll give you a synopsis of the past 5 months and the 3 damn distractions that were wearing out my pages and dimming my cover.

#1. Men

You know I always had the observation that no matter how “busy” any of my female friends were/are when it’s story telling time the one common denominator is that some dude comes the hell up. Now I’m not possessive of my friend’s time and I totally get that we can’t offer each other EVERYTHING that we need but in the back of my mind there’s always a little voice that’s like “dang girl WE coulda chilled and had a BETTER time if you were bored.” Well I was guilty of the top distraction for most single ladies: men. I wish I could tell you all that my extended single holiday is over but we all know summer is coming so that wouldn’t be the case here. Instead I was caught up in dealing with dudes who had nothing for me but games of trivial pursuits, almost dead-ends, and worst of all positive energy-zappers. Trivial pursuit men are the ones you hit up for one or maybe 2 things none of which are conversation and good company. Almost dead-ends are men who take you out once, and upon further conversation you realize will not be the next anything – but they may be able to offer you business opportunities and a chance to make money. Positive energy zappers are the guys (and girls apply here too) who you choose to motivate out of the kindness of your heart even though the job isn’t yours to do, they don’t want to be motivated, and they slosh around in the same hot stinky ass mess everyday. I managed to have all 3 thankfully except for the almost dead end, they’re gone after being excommunicated.

#2. Poop in a Cup x 2

“What the hell?” I’m sure you said to yourself with this title but…the life of a TRUE traveler is full of adventures both good & bad. So after returning from a week and half romp as Carmen (this trip was in February to Vietnam & Cambodia) …I was HURT. But didn’t realize it until almost a month out of feeling the pangs and pains of what was diagnosed as an intestinal infection. So I went to my general physician who instructed me to poop in a cup. After making that happen with great difficulty, a referral to a Gastroenterologist, and the conclusion that because my doc “couldn’t see inside” she had no meds for me, I went to the specialist for some relief. He diagnosed me and gave me meds, but then I got the (extremely late) call from my general doc that because THEY gave me the WRONG cup I had to go at it again. Freakin awesome!! So after not being able to eat properly for about 4 weeks, taking meds, losing weight (a small girl’s nightmare!) and STILL feeling weird, I had an endoscopy done and surprise! Your girl TDA has an ulcer too! Great. So I obliged everybody and finally … as in 2 weeks ago, got my appetite back and all is well…but being sick and working like you’re not is annoying as all hell…I’ll spare you the TMI details of that experience.

#3. Life as a Hustler

In the time that I’ve been MIA as TDA, I met with schools and businesses to establish partnerships for my nonprofit, consulted for another client, met with another potential client, networked my behind of, and wrote a ton of papers for college students. Although brokenness refuses to elude me, I was able to discover another revenue stream and hustle that I actually enjoy, meet some really cool folks, and expand my network. All while my cover was dimming no less! It was a rollercoaster ride but such is life.

So I was distracted…but never detoured. Cover was dim, but never put out. “Dass it!!” And now I’m back …healthier, able to eat again (yeesssss), with more crazy stories, content and a new look to boot. I hope you all keep reading, enjoy, share and comment. It’s going to be, as my favorite tranny Maurica would say about her platanos, yuuuicy!