How You Know

I’ve encountered a string of events that has solved one of the major questions regarding the opposite sex that women, boys, men, girls, puppies and even dogs either ask, think about or encounter in their lives. In the words of Whitney “How Do I Know If He Really Wants Me?” In this case “wants” means liked, is interested in and has some vested interest in you.

So I came upon this discovery after dealing with a motley crew of selfish ass niggas. You know the ones who serve absolutely NO purpose. In case you all are saying “Oh, Anne sounds so bitter right now” man I’ll “take that-take that” as if Diddy was dishing it himself. Because I’m not bitter, just observant. I’m not bitter I’m just tired of the whackness & bitchassness. And what most people call bitter is just a quick deflection tactic to take the steam, validity, and clarity out of what I know is my (and a few other people's) truths. 

But it’s cold out here and how is it that good & great people can’t get the simplest things?

Sometimes I might just want to talk. Especially if I actually pick up the phone and dial. I had Selfish #1 tell me at past 11pm on a work night: “Oh I thought you were coming over.” Whaaaaaa?! Like waaahhh? I almost burst out laughing before I informed him that I had work in the morning and that shit was DEAD. Convo ended very shortly thereafter. Ass (#2) had been in my phone getting options like it was a dealership. Being treated like a Ruth Chris Steakhouse as far as I was concerned. You know top-line treatment complete with “which hairstyle do you want for tonight?” options. I’ve learned that making guys feel special is a talent. Yeah I said it, but I also was wasting that talent expecting a little bit for me in return. WARNING: I live in a judgment-free zone. If you know you’re gonna be judging TDA then you shouldn’t even be reading what follows...

But if you are down to ride, sometimes all you want is what YOU want. It might not be the exact situation you would choose. But it ain’t all lilies, gumdrops, rainbows and dandelions out here. We have needs and just like these asses are out here capitalizing on the “statistics” – does NOT mean I will NOT be trying get mines! So would you believe I didn’t get nary a tongue-down from Ass #2 despite the hair options??! I didn’t even get a BEAR HUG. Damn. That’s cold. He was cut off the next day after a very honest account of what the damn deal REALLY is. And just a note on that, love will make you dumb…but never should you ever spare someone’s feelings if they DON’T spare yours. I was doing a lot of sparing and much to chagrin I’m still waiting for “the come back” so I can respond with the proper curse out that I feel is now due.

Then I get nigga in my phone just all types of cursin?! When I just wanted to SAY what’s up and not actually text since I didnt have time for all of that. The response “Whatever n**ga… I’m f**kin tired of ur f**kin cursin. Later”  I got business to handle. Don’t be all up on my phone with that shit. You need to be about some sunshine, happiness, peace and love up in my area.

So how did all these seemingly insurmountable nigga dealings lead me to the fountain of truth. Well I realized that for a man (and NOT a nigga since it’s not in niggas’ DNA to really do these types of things I surmise) to just do something because YOU would be happy is a big freaking deal. Actions aren’t being performed with the expectation of getting into the draws OR because it was convenient for them and THEY’RE in the mood. Let me repeat that: Actions are NOT being performed with the EXPECTATION of getting into the draws or because it was convenient for them and THEY’RE in the mood. Instead actions are performed because YOU would take pleasure from it or because you ASK (it couldn’t be easier). A phone call, an impromptu non-sexual hang-out, a question that shows you take SOME INTEREST in SOMETHING that you speak of often. 2 out of 3 of those are FREE.99 ladies & gents…There’s a lot of selfish ass niggas out there and I would be remiss if I didn’t add the disclaimer that niggas come in ALL shapes, genders, sizes, and colors  - so just be vigilant and keep your heart 3 stacks until you see actions that SHOW you he/she is into YOU. Even if you don’t agree with some of the statements made here today…::kicks dust with steel-toe boot:: we all can admit that streets are dry these days…